Embracing Change: The Power of Authenticity in Life Transitions

As we just recently wrapped up summer, I feel like the time of shedding and transitions have been so prominent. The ending of summer always feels strange, like saying goodbye to old friend or like leaving somewhere you love. This summer I turned 27 and whew- has it been a difficult period of growth. I shed people, things, and patterns that weren’t serving me anymore. I switched my job and left the safety net of coworkers I loved and a job I knew inside out. I know it was the right choice, but it still was an incredibly difficult decision. Some days this change felt empowering, other days I felt like the loneliest person on earth.

All of this on top of adjusting to the new job. I felt untethered, and the life I had created felt like it was floating away from me. I felt guilty whenever people asked me how my summer was or the new job was, because my answers were inauthentic. What if they found out I was drowning in all the change?

All this to say…has anyone ever talked about how hard transition periods and change are? Even when you know it’s the right next step and you know you need to let go. When we make exciting, scary, gut-wrenching leaps- it can still feel like we’re losing a piece of ourselves. Not to mention what you may mourn when you shift your perspective and journey. Friendships, old habits, old ways of thinking…the list goes on. It IS uncomfortable. It’s hard to move forward- even when it’s clear as day.

I think one of the hardest pieces of a transition is that our values change and adapt to who we become. Through these different stages of life with change, loss, grief, growth, experience, we begin to treasure different things. I know for me at 21, I was drinking too much, and my main food groups were tortilla chips and salsa. At 23, I was learning to live in a new city and build my life in Boston- I clung to whatever I could to avoid being lonely. At 24 and 25, I was chasing toxic relationships and trying to figure out what choosing me meant. At 26, I was learning that I need to believe in myself, and that I’m wildly capable. At 27, I cherish quality over quantity and am still learning to choose me. With the occasional beer and chips! Values will change. And people, things, habits, etc. will drop off. And it is okay. We change as we grow.

Whatever season of life you’re in right now and however you feel is okay. Tired? Not enough? Struggling? Overwhelmed? Excited? Let’s be real here- it’s not all bliss. Something I value more recently is authenticity. Being real and honest. This summer during my transition, I wanted to avoid the authenticity from fear people would judge how I was really feeling. That it wasn’t all happiness, feeling comfortable, etc. I want to invite us to have those honest conversations, share our struggles, and sit in those feels. Even as a therapist, my soul gets weighed down in this sometimes. But I’m lucky to have loved ones, places, and others that bring me back to who I am.

I feel a lot different three months into 27 already. After spending time working through all the big feelings; I feel free. I feel whole, I have people who choose me, I feel empowered.

So, my friends, remember to keep your head above the waves in transitions. Chase the change, even when it’s the scariest feeling in the world. Find what brings you back to center. Lean on your peeps. Set a routine for yourself. Take care of your body- remember it’s the only one you get. Have the cocktail, spend Intentional time with loved ones, and most importantly, yourself.

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Charty