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Transformative Healing: My Life-Changing Experience with a Gut Cleanse
- CJM
- Jun 5, 2025
- 7 min read
Remember a few months ago when trying on a bridesmaids dress brought me to my literal knees? I reflected on self love and about being present and how important it is to be happy in the skin you’re in. Back when I wrote that blog, I was heartbroken about how much weight I gained.
We live in a society that values ‘skinny’ and the idea that 'skinny is worthy'. We inhabit a world where Ozempic and liposuction are the desired options that have effectively put Weight Watchers out of business. It's changed our perspective as a society, that we should be able to take something and instantly achieve the results we want. (Ozempic for health/medical reasons is 100% great- I'm speaking on folks who take it as a 'bandaid' without changing any habits)
I grew up with the narrative of the ‘heavy’ kid, which pushed me to diet unhealthily, and feel like something was wrong with me. Others in my family were built so differently, it was another layer of feeling that I didn’t fit in. I was in a vicious cycle of constantly worrying about what I was eating, as well as eating just about anything.
I joined Weight Watchers over the summers during college. Tracking my food always felt better, and it was a healthy way to be aware of what I was eating. I loved the feeling of control over my eating and monitoring it. Small shifts in my diet here and there were key, however I fell off the WW wagon hard these last three years.
Everyone knows my struggle last year with the awful 6-month job, transitions, and stagnant chapter I had. Combine that stress and sadness with drinking too much, sitting all day, not paying attention to what I was putting in my body, and before I knew it I had gained about 20 pounds! Pants didn’t button, dresses didn’t zip, and my heart was so heavy. (Along with my FUPA!) I was the heaviest I’d ever been, and while I didn’t feel unbelievably overweight, I sure was down on myself.
I worked with a nutritionist last fall who was kind, but didn’t hold me accountable- which is apparently what I need. She was also a bodybuilder, so her style of eating and working out was hard to relate to, and I didn’t stay consistent. The next nutritionist I found through Tufts, suggested a juice diet and 700 calories a day. Pardon?
I was so deep in a rut. I called one of my friends from Siena (Olivia!) and vented to her how frustrated I was. Liv had the answer—and pointed me in the direction of her sister. Liv felt I shouldn’t be restricting to an insane number of calories a day but rather checking in with my gut to see what the issue was. My body was trying to tell me something.
Enter Elizabeth ‘Bee’ Westwood. She is such a ray of sunshine. She is a holistic nutritionist who takes the time to dive into your mind, body, and spirit. Her company is called Olive and Dove, and it’s the most beautiful creation! She approaches her work with personal experience, detoxifying suggestions, and different ways to fuel your body. Her kindness, compassion, and support throughout the journey makes you want to love yourself a little more. Bee is so knowledgeable and willing to walk with you to make changes and take on challenges.
We had met a few times before through Olivia, but I had a consultation with her in mid-April. I told her how frustrated I was, how I felt “HUGE!”, and how I wasn’t sure what was wrong. I work out five times a week, I focus on healthy living, and I try my best. What am I doing wrong?
Bee quickly explained to me the faults in this mindset. I was doing too much cardio and putting my body through hell. As most know, I live a very social life – I was drinking 3-4 times a week, binge drinking sugary drinks, and waking up hungover. I was having a ‘sweet treat’ late at night for happiness, I was ordering take out on the weekends as ‘entertainment,’ and I was focusing on food as excitement rather than nutrition. I was living hard and fast, barely considering what I was eating or drinking.
My gut was overloaded and working hard to try and regulate itself. I knew Bee was the answer to my prayers.
After beginning work together, Bee did her research on my history and symptoms, as it’s tailored personally to specific clients. She explained how I would go on a 30-day cleanse, or liver detox, to reset my system. She had me purchase a bunch of different supplements to detox, replenish, and get the icky bacteria out of my gut. I also needed to focus on whole foods.
During this time, I needed to cut sugar, processed snacks, carbs, sweet treats, and most alcohol. If I was drinking, I had vodka soda--all clear liquids baby! This was difficult to wrap my mind around. It sounds silly that I grappled with cutting most booze and fattening foods —but I did! It felt uncomfortable, it felt scary, and I wasn't sure what to expect. Despite these feelings, I knew I was desperate for a change.
Upon further behavioral observation of myself and reflection, I realized how much of an impulsive eater I am. It’s the weekend? Time for sushi takeout, Jersey Mike’s, and dessert! I had excuses to eat poorly, and I relied on food as a major entertainment factor. When I realized how much excitement I was seeking from food and alcohol, I knew I needed to shift.
And listen, food should be exciting, it should be FUN, but too much of that mentality isn’t good. I was lacking that balance. I wasn’t holding myself accountable nor was I aware of what I was putting in my body. Four glasses of wine is a lot of sugar. A sandwich from my favorite sub shop has a lot of sodium and fats.
When I impulsively ate, I would allow myself to have the cookie or baked good just because I wanted it. I needed that instant gratification through sugar, much like attention from a Hinge man. After eating processed sugar or carbs, immediately I’d feel like shit. I’m realizing that a lot of these foods aren’t worth it. They slow me down, so now I’m learning to shift and say no!
Furthermore, I realized I needed to move during the day more, despite an office job. I made walks during lunch and 10k steps intentional, which has helped immensely. I make it a plan to text some of my girlfriends to walk after work, as it's active and I get that social time! I'm still doing cardio workouts 2-3 times a week with some strength training mixed in.
Cutting way back on alcohol changed my narrative and life in more ways that I can say. I’m going to write another piece specifically on that relationship, but for now I’ll just say it changed how I view myself. Relying on alcohol for dates, social hang outs, and weekends was affecting me more than I knew. I used to pride myself on being able to stay out until 2am drinking and then wake up for a 9:30am spin class. I look back and it makes me tired and sick just thinking about it!
Reflecting on my relationship with alcohol allowed me to be present in ways I hadn’t before. I learned what the word intentional really meant--rather than just saying it. It was uncomfortable at first, but I realized I’m just as fun sober. I can still be everyone’s fun party girl without gallons of alcohol!
This mindset shift has changed how I enter a space and how I do things now with intention. I am sleeping better, my double chin has left the building, and I feel fulfilled. This lifestyle shift was ultimately about getting my body to a healthy place and changing the attitude I had toward food. But in a deeper sense, this was about choosing and loving me.
I preach to you all so much about loving yourself, but I was abandoning myself with shitty habits and drinking to escape. Perhaps that was part of my reluctance to make big shifts in food and drink awareness. What if THIS didn’t work? Where would I be then? If I was “all in” on Bee’s suggestions, and I kept the weight on, what did that mean? I would have “failed” at it.
This month-long cleanse has been a great way to get back into my body and reflect on how I take care of myself. Here’s something I didn’t expect from putting my health first - not everyone in your social circle will be comfortable with it! In explaining to friends how I'm not drinking as much, or how I’m avoiding sugar and carbs, sometimes I was met with negative reactions.
Friends who wanted to poke fun at ‘oh the wellness journey!’ or say, ‘Come on, it's just one dessert!’, or ‘how can you not want a margarita?’ and my favorite, ‘You don’t need to lose weight, you're fine!’ My life choices somehow reflected back their own insecurities. I learned to mostly keep my journey to myself because of these unexpected reactions.
The positive side of this was some of my girlfriends were inspired to go on their own wellness journeys and figure out what works for them. They started to look inward at their behaviors, foods, and mindset. It was so inspiring to help others on their road to better health!
I'm currently in the second part of my cleanse, which includes replenishing my gut and starting new supplements. One thing that won't change is the whole foods diet and cutting back on alcohol and sugar! It's helped me in so many ways and taught me about natural based eating. I'm working on staying consistent, despite weight now being slower to come off.
Bottom line - I’m so proud of myself. For choosing me, shifting unhealthy behaviors, and learning to lock in. Working out is one thing, but shifting the entire mindset I’ve had around food forever was so rewarding. I’m still working on a lot of this, but I knew I had to share it sooner rather than later!
Articles coming on Elizabeth and that alcohol shift very soon.
LOVE YA,
-Char
Everyone's health and wellness journeys are different. What worked for me may not work for others! It's best to consult a doctor or nutritionist for specific supplements and a plan.
Wondering if your gut is going through the same symptoms I had? I've linked some articles to help support if needed!
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